“I have much more to say to you, more than you can now bear. But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. He will glorify me because it is from me that he will receive what he will make known to you. All that belongs to the Father is mine. That is why I said the Spirit will receive from me what he will make known to you.”
John 16:12-15 NIV
Memories, you know? They keep going back further and further in my mind, as I ponder all that went on there in my youth. But, lets cut in at that speech, back in 1983, it was me speaking, in response to the toast to the bride, my first wife.
Well, having said that LOL< lets go back a little bit further for a moment, all my life I’ve been reading my bible. I remember one particular time, I was in grade 10. My bible reading took on a new phase. I’d read through the first chapter of Romans and it all went in one eye, and out the other. I retained nothing, I gained nothing, I learned nothing. One of the verses that I had retained over the years was John 14:26, and rightly or wrongly I claimed this truth of that verse for me:
- That the Holy Spirit was given, to me, to teach me God’s word. The Holy Spirit is my teacher.
- So, I informed God in prayer, and by subsequent action that I would not be leaving that first chapter of Romans until I understood it.
- I read it daily until it began to sink in.
Since then I’ve gone back to Romans chapter 1 many many times. It has been a foundational chapter.
From there my journey through the Bible has been according to that same pattern. My effort is to read, and meditate, his is to teach me and remind me.
But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you.
John 14:26 ESV
The “remind me” part is profound because I’ll be in a conversation or writing, and scriptures will come to my mind. I’ve learned to actually go to the passage, and read the verse that came to mind in its full context, and the food is surely food indeed. I then know all the more, by experience, that God has been the one speaking to me, by his Holy Spirit.
Another thing that began to happen somewhere along the way is that God would bring me to theme verses or chapters.
That photo at the top, is to begin to pull you into the “thing” I’ve been called to write about today. What’s with those big doors. Hopefully by the end here, you can tell me what they’ve come to mean. And then the verses, John 16:12-15. Those verses are at first obscure until you’ve read what I’ve written here. So you’re reading here is flavored by that verse.
God has always been faithful to prepare me for what’s coming up in my life. Way back when I prayed on a street corner, while on my way to catch a bus, I prayed a prayer. I acknowledged that God was there. I asked him to teach me in a way that I could understand, and prove himself to me. Is this his Bible, is this his church, all those questions I had.
Part of God being faithful to that prayer is that he prepares me for what’s coming. Just like Jesus did with the disciples in John, they still didn’t “get it” by the way. It wasn’t until after that they realized fully all that he’d come to teach them.
You know when a movie starts off with the turning point event, and the rest of the movie is a flashback of what led up to it?
I’m kinda tired of trying to explain it… what I mean is that the verse is understood through the real life context of events that transpire after I receive it. That’s what I call “Theme Verses”
Now, that was a flashback on a flashback, because I entered my marriage with the book of 1 Peter as my theme, and I marveled out loud, as I gave the speech that followed the toast to the bride, on August 20, 1983.
1 Peter, to me, was about suffering. And I mentioned as I gestured with a sweeping hand to my bride, how could a beautiful wife like that have anything to do with suffering?
Anyone who knows me, and my story, will smile a knowing smile. First Peter was exactly what I needed to keep in mind. It was part of his preparing me, preserving me.
Its so hard to recall, although I vividly recall it, but the hard part is if I could go back, I’d want to tell that young man (me, remember?) all about how the suffering that would take place! She would be central to it. But also, just as 1 Peter says, it was for the purification of my faith.
New International Version:
1 Peter 1:3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, 5 who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. 6 In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7 These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 8 Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, 9 for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
I Peter 1:3-9 New International Version
1 Peter 1:6-9 J B Phillips:
Its great when you actually go to the scripture that comes to mind, because its harder to shape the verse into my own life experience, instead of submitting to what the scripture says. I’d like to let God off the hook, but look at what Peter says:
- “This is no accident—it happens to prove your faith”
So is God the source of suffering? Who would suppose so? I don’t want to quibble. But I’m willing to learn. Willing to be wrong here.
But God does allow suffering. He doesn’t shield us from it. If He did, how would we know he’s even there? As J B Phillips puts it, “At present you trust him without being able to see him, and even now he brings you a joy that words cannot express” in verse 8.
Think of a group of young men, who are told by their master to go from A to B. And along the way they encounter evil-doers who mean to harm them. We who have the benefit of seeing all around them, ahead and behind, see the lurking losers. And those neophyte’s among us might call out, “Oh! God! How could you send them into certain death like that?!?!” And God would smile, maybe, or maybe he’d smack you on the back of the head and tell you to shut up and watch what’s about to transpire.
But why go to the pretense of stories made up? Why not look at Daniel in the Lion’s den, or Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego who were thrown into the blazing hot furnace by that embarrassed Tyrant Nebuchadnezzar?
Now look at the tail end of this verse:
In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will,
Ephesians 1:11 NIV
“…him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will.” I wonder how Phillips puts it: “… by the one who achieves his purposes by his sovereign will”
So, lets get right out of the theoretical and into my own personal experience. The ultimate point of suffering that came through that first marriage, when she walked us to divorce, was when I found myself in Jail.
They came for me late at night, after being told by my wife that I had threatened to kill her and the children. She took advantage of the hype in the air at the time over a big story in the media. A new phrase we’d not heard before was entered into the public vocabulary, Criminal Harassment. Although it was nothing new, a fellow had threatened, and police didn’t act on the complaints, and he ended up murdering the lady he was threatening. On top of all of this, she used my children to call me and find out exactly where I was, because the police were out looking for me. The paddy wagon came for me, and a police officer. God gave me grace right away, as I was not taken in the back of the paddy wagon, but in the back seat of the police cruiser. Among the things he asked me was, “Is you wife a vindictive woman?” I asked him what vindictive meant. sigh.
- It turned out that when she’d warned me, “if you fight this divorce, you’ll regret it” she made good on it that day. She waited for her opportunity, and took it. At first I didn’t put up a fight, she was slandering me already in the courts, and when I realized that I’d better get a lawyer, I did so.
The officer brought me into the cop shoppe at Main and Hastings, and after handing in my paperwork to the boys at the desk, he left me standing there in the area where free folks could stand, and he walked out. Then the men behind the desk came and opened the holding cell door, and directed me inside. I sat down cold and sober. There was a guy there across from me who’d had a ham and pineapple pizza earlier that evening, wanna know how I found that out? He was passed out, and the contents of his stomach lay beside him. I remember a crack pipe being passed around – I wasn’t included – it was and is the most frightening thing that ever happened to me. Soon they took us each to the cells, where we would spend the night, two by two. Metal bunks with thin yoga type mats for mattresses. A metal sink and a metal toilet that didn’t have a lid. I can’t tell you much about the guy I was put in there with. I didn’t win him to Jesus that night. I was too frightened. I climbed up on the top bunk, and he said to me, “Hey? You a hype?” (which meant he was hoping for some drugs from me) I didn’t answer him. Later on when the guards locked the outer door. There were ab out 12 cells, inside a big room, that itself had a locked door. There was some noise from the far end of the room. I can’t recall the details but a pop-up drug store was brought about… a guy had smuggled Valium into his cell, the pills were inside a condom, that was up his orifice, which he pulled out, and was dispensing into little torn squares of paper with a McDonald stir stick… they don’t have those anymore by the way, but they apparently served out the perfect amount of the drug. And the offer was made to roll or throw a looney over to him, and he’d pass y’all a folded up package of the downer.
As I lay there on the top bunk, I remember two things very distinctly. That’s when and where I told God that it was over. I didn’t want to be with anyone that could do such a thing as that to me. The second was that although I was afraid, I was completely at peace. The only way to describe it would be to draw you a picture. But first a verse,
Delight yourselves in God, yes, find your joy in him at all times. Have a reputation for gentleness, and never forget the nearness of your Lord.
Don’t worry over anything whatever; tell God every detail of your needs in earnest and thankful prayer, and the peace of God which transcends human understanding, will keep constant guard over your hearts and minds as they rest in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:1-7 J B Phillips
First picture is a room full of folks who just heard some bad news about their town. There’s muttering, panicking, finger pointing… and then God strolls up to the front, and takes the microphone… and he stands there, looking at them all calmly, one by one the room grows silent, and all eyes rest on him. His presence, his peace, his authority governs the room. It rules, and peace prevails.
Another picture. Its water, calm still water, who’s surface was like glass… and just above that you’d see my mind personified as a person, who was trying to reach that glassy calm water to disturb it… but I couldn’t reach it. I couldn’t make myself panic. I was at perfect peace. I didn’t know how all this would work out, but I had a perfect peace. God showed up,
“At present you trust him without being able to see him, and even now he brings you a joy that words cannot express”
1 Peter 1:6-9 J B Phillips
I experienced God’s supernatural presence.
How could I ever wish to trade that experience away? It remains ever with me.
The next day after signing my promise to appear papers, which included a promise to stay completely out of contact with my ex and our children, I was given my belongings, and I remember what it felt like once again to be a free man, after that one night locked in a cell. I remember sitting in a coffee shop in Kitsilano along Cornwall Avenue, musing about the Joy in my heart.
God had allowed that suffering, and he kept me safe through out it. I’ve since then found other verses that help me in times of trouble,
If anyone does attack you, it will not be my doing;
Isaiah 54:15-17 NIV
whoever attacks you will surrender to you… no weapon forged against you will prevail (prosper)
I was an imperfect man, being perfected by the hand of God… my faith was being perfected also. And, by the way, I am still an imperfect man, being perfected. 1 Thessalonians 5:23-24
At some point I quit pointing the finger of blame at everyone else, and took on the task of realizing what I’d done, my character defects, the lapses in my faith. He’s led me all these years between then and now, to where I am. A grateful result of all that he has done, and all that he’s allowed.
That all brings to mind, me standing on a street corner in North Vancouver, and I was meditating on John 15… if you abide in me, and I abide in you, you will bear fruit. No such dynamic was in my life, but I confessed it as such, and asked God to bring about the truth of those verses in my life. I wanted my life to be not so much about what I said, but that my faith would be seen in my actions. That my fruit would be a tangible result of God’s work.
3-10 As far as we are concerned we do not wish to stand in anyone’s way, nor do we wish to bring discredit on the ministry God has given us. Indeed we want to prove ourselves genuine ministers of God whatever we have to go through—patient endurance of troubles or even disasters, being flogged or imprisoned; being mobbed, having to work like slaves, having to go without food or sleep. All this we want to meet with sincerity, with insight and patience; by sheer kindness and the Holy Spirit; with genuine love, speaking the plain truth, and living by the power of God. Our sole defense, our only weapon, is a life of integrity, whether we meet honour or dishonour, praise or blame. Called “impostors” we must be true, called “nobodies” we must be in the public eye. Never far from death, yet here we are alive, always “going through it” yet never “going under”. We know sorrow, yet our joy is inextinguishable. We have “nothing to bless ourselves with” yet we bless many others with true riches. We are penniless, and yet in reality we have everything worth having.
2 Corinthians 6:3-10 J B Phillips
Running Down Vimy 
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