God is My Only Obstacle

What is an Obstacle?

If I am called by God, to DO, whatever that DO is… can only be impeded by God himself.

I’m not my lifetime I’ve learned about paradox. First a curious kind of observation how God dealt with Balaam… don’t go, then you may go…

Let’s go take a look…

¹² But God said to Balaam, “Do not go with them. You must not put a curse on those people, because they are blessed.”

²⁰ That night God came to Balaam and said, “Since these men have come to summon you, go with them, but do only what I tell you.”

Numbers 22:12 & 20

Numbers 22:12 & 20

So it’s all good… right?

Hmmm… there’s not much distance between verse 20 and 21… seems like it was a night’s sleep was had. Cuz in verse 20 God’s saying,

“Yes, go…” but look at verse 22?!? What the heck happened?!? Nothing is said as to cause… just that God is angry with Balaam “when he went…” take a look:

²¹ Balaam got up in the morning, saddled his donkey and went with the Moabite officials. ²² But God was very angry when he went, and the angel of the Lord stood in the road to oppose him. Balaam was riding on his donkey, and his two servants were with him.²³ When the donkey saw the angel of the Lordstanding in the road with a drawn sword in his hand, it turned off the road into a field. Balaam beat it to get it back on the road.
²⁴ Then the angel of the Lord stood in a narrow path through the vineyards, with walls on both sides.²⁵ When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, it pressed close to the wall, crushing Balaam’s foot against it. So he beat the donkey again.
²⁶ Then the angel of the Lord moved on ahead and stood in a narrow place where there was no room to turn, either to the right or to the left. ²⁷ When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, it lay down under Balaam, and he was angry and beat it with his staff.²⁸ Then the Lord opened the donkey’s mouth, and it said to Balaam, “What have I done to you to make you beat me these three times?”
²⁹ Balaam answered the donkey, “You have made a fool of me! If only I had a sword in my hand, I would kill you right now.”
³⁰ The donkey said to Balaam, “Am I not your own donkey, which you have always ridden, to this day? Have I been in the habit of doing this to you?”
“No,” he said.
³¹ Then the Lord opened Balaam’s eyes, and he saw the angel of the Lord standing in the road with his sword drawn. So he bowed low and fell facedown.
³² The angel of the Lord asked him, “Why have you beaten your donkey these three times? I have come here to oppose you because your path is a reckless one before me. ³³ The donkey saw me and turned away from me these three times. If it had not turned away, I would certainly have killed you by now, but I would have spared it.”
³⁴ Balaam said to the angel of the Lord, “I have sinned. I did not realize you were standing in the road to oppose me. Now if you are displeased, I will go back.”
³⁵ The angel of the Lord said to Balaam, “Go with the men, but speak only what I tell you.” So Balaam went with Balak’s officials.

Numbers 22:21-35

This is where I insert the fact that I’m no Bible scholar. I’m a bus driver. I’m an ordinary man, reading the bible with you.

This assertion? Suspicion? Accusation?

“God is my only obstacle” appeared in my journal one day. It was in my own hand writing LOL. But I can let you know that I was about 26 years old, and frustrated with trying to get to where I was convinced I should be by now. I always journal. Lately it seems I do so by shouting down this well that nobody is drawing water from. But back then it was in various notebooks.

I found out from Anne Lamott (Bird by Bird) and Marion Milner (A Life of One’s Own)… that these things happen when you “get lost” while writing… your inmost being, untethered by should and shouldn’t… past the goal posts of trying to impress… and just expressing what’s flowing out… writing – flowing –

Then the next day you are re-reading… and you realize, you see… and well, “God is my only obstacle” was there one day… and what puzzled me then, and not so much now is that folks reaction to that statement… the lack of willingness to engage with me in discussing just what that meant…

Hebrews 5:11-14

Obedience