First one is of me, making my way through the woods, and it’s been a struggle… a very personal struggle… cuts, bruises, stinking, stumbling… and I find a clearing, I emerge from the woods, and others are there… by the very fact of there being no other way to get there, it’s unspoken that we all got here in similar fashion.
Another image rises up… it’s imposed rule or authority, a fish on a line, hook in mouth, and I’ve given up!
Exhausted as I am!
I’m helpless against being finally reeled in, a net scoops me up, into the boat, my flesh is eaten, my shell is stuffed and mounted on the wall. “Bertha” is on fake brass plaque beneath my likeness there.
Or it’s a fellow laying down all that he’s ever believed in… and yielding to the overwhelming force that’s pursued him… he’s now forced to pay homage and kiss the ring of the deity enthroned at the front and centre. But all that is an act of outward submission… a yielding to a force that has beaten him down.
The image on the right is of a meadow, gentle blowing breezes, and one big happy family communing together, over cook fires and freshly cleaned clothes hanging out to dry, shady spaces.
The image on the right is a sleeping dragon in chains…
When we don’t get what we want?
When our notion of what ought to be isn’t in sync with reality?
Safe Houses, Quiet Gardens
But look! A king will rule in the right way, and his leaders will carry out justice.
Each one will stand as a shelter from high winds, provide safe cover in stormy weather.
Each will be cool running water in parched land, a huge granite outcrop giving shade in the desert.
Anyone who looks will see, anyone who listens will hear. The impulsive will make sound decisions, the tongue-tied will speak with eloquence.
No more will fools become celebrities, nor crooks be rewarded with fame.
For fools are fools and that’s that, thinking up new ways to do mischief.
They leave a wake of wrecked lives and lies about God,
Turning their backs on the homeless hungry, ignoring those dying of thirst in the streets.
And the crooks? Underhanded sneaks they are, inventive in sin and scandal, Exploiting the poor with scams and lies, unmoved by the victimized poor.
But those who are noble make noble plans, and stand for what is noble.
The mind of the rash will have good judgment, and the tongue of the stammerers will speak readily and distinctly. RSV
The mind of the hasty will discern the truth, And the tongue of the stammerers will hasten to speak clearly. NASV (1995)
Here’s the context>
1-8 But look! A king will rule in the right way, and his leaders will carry out justice. Each one will stand as a shelter from high winds, provide safe cover in stormy weather. Each will be cool running water in parched land, a huge granite outcrop giving shade in the desert. Anyone who looks will see, anyone who listens will hear. The impulsive will make sound decisions, the tongue-tied will speak with eloquence. MSG
A lesson God is teaching me of late, perhaps my whole life up to now…
I’ve noticed in my life that from time to time folks have learned not to mess with me. I’ve risen up on my hind legs, and rebuked them. But I was humbled. As I gathered myself up off the ground, I sizzled for a while. I let everything submerge, and I didn’t speak of it for a couple of weeks. It was there in my prayers, and my thoughts, and in poetic moments it came out.
Laying it all aside, I left it over there —->
And moved instead into God.
I write out the Bible. Its tangible. It focuses me. Its wooden. Do you know what I mean by wooden? I wonder if there’s another way to express it. Its strictly a function of my body. My eyes see the Bible, a physical bible on my table, and my hand grasps the pen, notebook. My mind guides my action. There is no excitement I guess is what I’m trying to say. Not like the hunger of pulling into a Pho place with my brother Andrew for a good meal. There is the gentle hope that when I spend time… when I invest time? In God’s word, that it always yields relationship with him. If I’m ever gonna find him, its gonna be there in his word, somewhere…
And here, while writing out Isaiah 32… verse 4 burst out at me… and was the catalyst for pulling together all that God has been teaching me.
Healing in the aftermath of the humbling… Thank you Lord, for never letting me down.
Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.
Once upon a time I thought of myself as “nobody in particular” and I was close… now I’m thinking, I need to act like an Angel.
Someone who shows up in someone else’s life, blesses them in some way, and then leaves.
The difference is no business card hoping for further interaction.
The business card, and this Blog both have been about my personal significance, leaving my mark, a legacy?
Or that’s a little too hard on myself… it’s just that I’m noticing nobody is actually getting back to me… all cards are like fishing lures turning up with Zero fish…
Maybe I’m just trying to recreate the part I miss about transit driving. Enjoying a blessed interaction with a random stranger.
As I think over what you said last night… I wonder if the heart of what you were saying got through to me. I’d like to find out more about it. I want to hear you.
I write this Blog… and have yet to have any followers… nobody is listening to me… and yet, you have witnessed occasions when I spoke up at Bible Study… and they did listen 🤔
Consider Jesus words here>
47 “If anyone hears my words but does not keep them, I do not judge that person. For I did not come to judge the world, but to save the world. 48 There is a judge for the one who rejects me and does not accept my words; the very words I have spoken will condemn them at the last day. 49 For I did not speak on my own, but the Father who sent me commanded me to say all that I have spoken. 50 I know that his command leads to eternal life. So whatever I say is just what the Father has told me to say.”
If you and I happen upon one another and you find that I don’t shut up much… part of it is because I get overwhelmed God’s Holy Spirit, speaking to me… it’s encouraging to know God has taken time out of his busy day to speak with us, yes?
Responding to that word inside of your heart… by reaching out to others through Love…
Self deprecation… is when I say something bad about myself. I often scold friends by telling them they’re bit allowed to talk about my friend like that, even if that friend is the person speaking to me! Another word is to stay away from negative self talk! Each flaw – I think – has a positive aspect to it! We do well to understand our flaws, and to thereby be inspired… to change for the better… but we also need to balance our self criticism…
… speaking against the Lord’s servant.
Self deprecation… is speaking against the Lord’s servant!
Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand.
Today I realized a slightly different reason for me talking… and it is because YOU are inspiring me?
Romans 1:11-12 speaks of what happens when we are in one another’s physical presence?
Matthew 18:19-20 clarifies things, when I meet up with a person, and if we are gathered in his name… he is there… God is always here with me.
In Romans 1:11-12 Spiritual gift is mentioned, in Matthew 18, God promising to be in our midst…
I walk around with an empty agenda?
I walk around with an empty agenda?
My mission, my value is to Love others, and to be a SAFE PLACE TO BE.
If your heart is right, you’ll live right!
Yes, I need to cultivate the gift of listening… sometimes YOU will patiently wait… and when you speak to me, it is HIS WORD.
Walkingdownvimy@gmail.com
Look around here, in this blog… see what attracts your eye, and say something back! Email me is what I’m saying, and also… share with others what your heart is now inspired to ponder…
Today 4th June I affectionately pay tribute to my Brother Laurence ‘s revolutionary help to his Brother Andrew! In little parts and pieces throughout the day I will acknowledge, with deep gratitude, the many achievements and help Laurence has been for over a year now. Let’s go!
Laurence started out in Family style by meeting his brother at the airport with his brother Glenn in toe! Immediately we were conveyed by a beautiful blue Ram truck to the best pizza known to Brand’s, Boston Pizza! Did Laurence pick up the tab. Being a pure gentleman he probably did!
Almost immediately we were conveyed, Glenn still our great companion, to a phone shop to set up an account based on HIS account! $60 monthly, a task of which was his, automatically, without my saying so, each month that bill gets paid from my funds, through Laurence.
An RbnB was waiting for me near Laurence ‘s home for a remarkable price.
The manager of the facility was a prince! A Canadian Chinese, hard worker of a man.
I rarely remember names, so I stand to be helped. Laurence shut up and take it! This is your day!
Next, Laurence takes me downtown to meet the great Demetrius Schwab at the Salvation Army homeless center. There we were introduced to a great resource in Mr. Schwab!
This resource didn’t amount to very much, although Demetrius followed our journey and supported by email, often initiating reconnection.
Laurence was there with me and for me when I applied to get into the Salvation Army ‘s downtown facility for, (what was it called? Oh, housing anyway.) I was subsequently rejected to get into their housing on the basis of Mr being deemed “inappropriate ” for their facility. (I failed at the point of a personal interview)
Laurence was there for moral support, He was genuinely disappointed in their inhumane policies. So important, everyone, to be there, taking his time, sympathizing with me when I was met with rejection. Next, we went, by his beautiful blue Ram truck to the facility down the road.
(What was it called? Oh, help me out…oh, let me think. Another housing facility for the homeless.)
You see, and this I must stress, Andrew William Brand, the but part movie actor from Seoul, South Korea, was now homeless. NEVER, did Brother Laurence ever let me feel judged.
At that homeless facility we were put on an endless waiting list. * bit part actor, “Okay, everybody, do not use the washroom, we’re going to show you my Brother Andrew ‘s scene. And do not look at your popcorn either. Okay, Greg, turn it on.”As a side note, Cheryl and Laurence procured a wheeled carrying basket for my groceries. ( which, incidentally me feel 62, which I was, by the way. )
I dragged full loads of groceries home to the R B n B from Saveon Foods, by bus, along the roadway.
[ Once I lost my way, being sometimes terrible with directions.] on route to my lovely home. Laurence was there on the phone, helping me with Whatsapp video, to find my way to the hotel! Laurence introduced me to a workmates, Rick, who also drives a school bus; a man he has known, for decades? Rick connected me to AA meetings. Coming by, WITHOUT FAIL, to transport me to a daily AA meeting. We are not even a month in, and Laurence ‘s contributions just go on. We shall continue, be patient, this is a DAY for Brother Laurence. STAGE II. Laurence assumes helping roles in Brother Andrew’s domestic/economic life. ie; my banker. Laurence began to have or almost assume the role of ‘power of attorney ‘ for Andrew. Laurence learned my passwords and was very capable of moving money around. Especially the everyday tasks of moving money from my BMO savings account to my Chequing account.
Laurence makes certain that my reasonably priced phone bill is paid. ($60) I love my Samsung android, never mind you Apple users. Laurence always tops up my chequing account, (which I use for interact payments with my card. )
Laurence frighteningly is able to see into all purchases that I make. He loves to tease me by saying. “So, Shoppers Drug Mart, what cost you $80.00, Buddy?”
When I was in my legal Marijuana experimental phase, (which concerned him) ,,Laurence would comment, “Well, the cannibas shop eh, Andrew. How’s that working our for ya, Buddy?” Frightening! Now, with regards to my bank account, (and this falls into the category of a cautionary, constructive criticism for my Brother. ) Laurence knows how much dough, moola, cash I have in my savings account. Laurence has the tendency to come to me with family loan requests. ( things he has passed on or requests he is participating in) which I am completely free to decide on or not. No judgment! Often times Laurence will say , when I decline, “Cheryl said the same thing, I’m proud of you, Buddy!”III. An aside:
Now, being SUDDENLY homeless is, to say the least, uncomfortable. Distressing. In fact, if I was to bring research to this gratitude day for Laurence, it might bore you all. Suffice it to say that being homeless is traumatic. In fact, I am able to say with certainty that I was traumatized by my sudden homelessness.
To go from Seoul, South Korea where I always had an apartment, a loft apartment the last time. Always having somewhere to call home. Asking, or never having to ask anyone for anything; never EVER asking family or friends for loans for anything. To go from that position to homeless, relying upon the SYSTEM for food, shelter and support. This is traumatic.
Laurence had a knowledge, an idea, a grain of compassion to understand how difficult that might be for Brother Andrew. Never did I feel anything but support from Brother Laurence. Part IV.
The “NO UNCERTAIN TERMS, TALKING TOs” Lectures, Laurence playing a Father figure, lecturing Brother Andrew on the fine art of staying out of the gutter. (And Laurence used those very words. “You wanna play around with your medication, stop taking it, playing around with it, you’re gonna be in the gutter. In fact, do you see that gutter down there, right outside your AIR BnB, that’s the gutter you’ll find yourself in, Andrew!!”
Did I appreciate the Lectures? Ask yourself the question; in the heat of the moment, would YOU appreciate these Lectures? Was it true? I was not about to find out. Talk about the F___king fear of God!!
For thus I am grateful to my brother Laurence! I will be your father figure
(Oh baby)
Put your tiny hand in mine
(I’d love to)
I will be your preacher teacher
(Be your daddy)
Anything you have in mind
(It would make me)
I will be your father figure
(Very happy)
I have had enough of crime
(Please let me)
I will be the one who loves you
‘Til the end of time Part V.
Dinners out, trips to the Island to an AIR BNB to visit the nephews, fully welcome and invited. No pressure at all. “Do you WANT to come to the bowling alley, Buddy? Or…”
“I’ll just stay here.”
” No trouble.”
Food at the food court on the way over to the Island before boarding the ferry.
Boston Pizza occasions with great company.
Sensitivity with regard to anything and everything. Visiting the home of my nieces, with a measure of social anxiety, whispering in my brother’s ear. “Ah, can we cut this short?”
Laurence laughs. “Okay, Buddy.”VI. On the move!
I am grateful to my Brother Laurence for transporting me from place to place. For instance, “HOPE FOR FREEDOM SOCIETY ” in Maple Ridge. Sitting with Brother Andrew for the intake by the staff at “HOPE FOR FREEDOM SOCIETY “
Laurence educates everyone for miles around on Andrew’s tendency to get off his medication and get high. “FOR Andrew, just not taking his meds will get him high, folks.”
VIII. “Those Little Things That You Do and Have Done”
Brother Laurence bought me a beautiful watch! A watch which I gratefully wore on my left wrist, able to tell time with just a glance. This was because Laurence envisioned me not having my smartphone at certain recovery centers. A beautiful watch, which someone lifted, yes stole from me in the comings and goings from place to place.
Loneliness floods my soul, as once again I find myself alone in a room full of Gods people.
He is enough.
I wonder about the lyrics, so let’s look at it from both sides.
I don’t want anyone else I don’t need anything else You are my one thing You are my one thing I don’t want anyone else I don’t need anything else You are my one thing You are my one thing
In the Old Testament there are lots of lone wolves… I read somewhere that it’s characteristic of the Old Testament times… so tell me my reader… is that the case?
Articles found when researching with good ole Google
Link 2 – wow! A slamming of the lone wolf… I get it though… someone who can’t be part of the church body is hurting. My own struggle is here in this department. Going to church is out of obedience to God’s word both in my heart, and in the pages of scripture. I don’t know if the writer here means it to come across that way but… it feels a bit like the cancel culture all around me… when you’re not living right and folks are quick with the knife to cut you loose…
Link 3 – here’s an interesting one! Look at this part:
She makes many good points. Focusing on that one up there. Each of us is alone with God, and yet in fellowship with one another.
It makes me think of what happened when Peter confronted Jesus, and Jesus response was that say,
Jesus Predicts His Death
21 From that time on Jesus began to explain to his disciples that he must go to Jerusalem and suffer many things at the hands of the elders, the chief priests and the teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and on the third day be raised to life.
22 Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. “Never, Lord!” he said. “This shall never happen to you!”
23 Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.”
That moment summed up my whole life. And that’s the story I have to tell.
By the way…
There’s more than a few books where the end brings about a true climax! You suddenly find yourself in an unexpected ecstasy! And you couldn’t have gotten there by any short cut.
Babbit “Gosh, dad, are you really going to be human?”
The Great Gatsby, “Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that’s no matter. Tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther… and one fine morning… So we beat on, Boats against the current, Borne back ceaselessly into the past.
Darkness At Noon, the last page has so much in it, but that book I’d listened to as an audiobook… and I didn’t see the end coming! Read it! And you’ll know what I mean!
Lemonade’s not like that… it’s all there, in a jug, for a dime a glass, and the dime’s going to the good cause of that young person serving it to you.
So today I’m putting up my guns. No more shoving my tripe down your throats. The Lemonade stand is in my wagon, and I’m not walking back to my house.
When you’re enjoying the good part of gossip, its hard to resist. Its like a good meal. It feels so good, and when you have a sense of humour, others will join in and its a laugh fest. Its a huge sorta liberating adventure for all present <recognizing their common ground> and becoming a cohesive group… all except for that person that is being turned on the spit, over the fire, who isn’t there in all actuality, to defend themselves, or give their side of the story, or to enjoy the fun. They contribution to the party, isn’t self sacrificing, cuz they’re not there, but then again, they kind of are there, eh?
My whole life long this has been the way for me. And there’s one man, that’s recently stood up to me, and refused to back down, in his defense of the one not present.
It hurts to be wrong.
It hurts to be wrong at the one thing I so desire to be good at, it hurts to be so absolutely the opposite of what I think I stand for.
My desire, my goal, my mission is, “To Be A Safe Place To Be”
I’d like to tell you the story that’s here in particular, but I’d enjoy telling it too much, and you’d enjoy hearing it too much, and then we’d both be consoling me out the whole notion of repentance.
My point is, its not loving. Its not.
I’m sorry Lord. Forgive me Lord God.
9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
12 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
Running Down Vimy 