Buried Wounds

On the headstone, the final words are written, they are the epitaph, written by the ones who hardly know. There is the date you were born, and the date you died, then the epitaph that says in essence rest in peace.

I remember the incident very clearly in my mind. I know that that’s when and where a sweet, beautiful boy who loved me and cherished me, the one who knew that I loved him with my heart of hearts.

He came to me and he said please help me with my daddy. And…

Well, I didn’t help, or did I?

That is yet to be known

I am still, and always will, be doing the best I can with what I’ve got

That day, I knew that I had no voice, I had no power. If I tried to mount my troops and go to war! The result would’ve been my bloody end, never to be seen or heard from ever again. 

And so I renamed until just now, until just now… and what does the hold.

To be honest, I just don’t know that I know I know I know I know who holds the future.

Desmond! Turn to God, and tell him all about it!

I often get accused of being cryptic. Grampa see’s Desmond coming down the path to his home.

Yes, oh yes, that’s me your grandpa waiting for you. What’s in his left hand there? That’s the things he has to do, his day-to-day. You didn’t know he had a dog! But that dog is happy! He’s excited to see Desmond coming down that path! See those little incidental flowers growing there?

And the epitaph? Those are the words that settled on your heart as you tried to understand why grandpa just walked away. The wound the wound is what lays there in that grave, with the epitaph. It’s not you! It’s not you and I! The You! The “you and I” that is grandpa and Desmond! 

If you were allowed to speak! If you were allowed to shout the words! They might be YOU did you forsake me, grandpa!? Why did you walk away and leave me there? 

And it’s not me, who beckons you, to come and see, it’s your father God, in heaven, who bids you to come and see. To make your way down down the path, to where God dwells.

For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. Romans 1:21 NIV

…another way of putting it is:

But God’s angry displeasure erupts as acts of human mistrust and wrongdoing and lying accumulate, as people try to put a shroud over truth. But the basic reality of God is plain enough. Open your eyes and there it is! By taking a long and thoughtful look at what God has created, people have always been able to see what their eyes as such can’t see: eternal power, for instance, and the mystery of his divine being. So nobody has a good excuse. What happened was this: People knew God perfectly well, but when they didn’t treat him like God, refusing to worship him, they trivialized themselves into silliness and confusion so that there was neither sense nor direction left in their lives. They pretended to know it all, but were illiterate regarding life. They traded the glory of God who holds the whole world in his hands for cheap figurines you can buy at any roadside stand.

Romans 1:18-21 The Message

…another way of putting it is:

Now the holy anger of God is disclosed from Heaven against the godlessness and evil of those men who render truth dumb and inoperative by their wickedness. It is not that they do not know the truth about God; indeed he has made it quite plain to them. For since the beginning of the world the invisible attributes of God, e.g. his eternal power and divinity, have been plainly discernible through things which he has made and which are commonly seen and known, thus leaving these men without a rag of excuse. They knew all the time that there is a God, yet they refused to acknowledge him as such, or to thank him for what he is or does. Thus they became fatuous in their argumentations, and plunged their silly minds still further into the dark. 

J B Phillips

…another way of putting it is:

Well, how would YOU put it?

I was angry because things didn’t turn out the way I wanted, I didn’t understand this life, and the things that have been handed to me by God didn’t think the tyrant why so many powerful oppressors so easily place the under their power! Thank him?! Thank you?! Are you freaking kidding me?! What do I have to thank that tiny little god, who wouldn’t lift a finger to help me??? My thinking became futile and my foolish heart was darkened.

But then, GOD, he sent his light, his merciful gracious light! He shone that light into my soul! and he said, and to me come out of that cave, and so I emerged when I walked towards the voice! And I heard these words, before I got there to that burning light 

Not to be accused of plagiarism LOL:

And Moses said, “Here I am.”

⁵ “Do not come any closer,” God said. “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground.” Exodus 3:4-5 NIV

As as I fell face down, prostrate before the Lord, our God, he reminded me of the words Christ Jesus spoke,

Matthew 7:1-6…